Talk:Amor Prohibido (song)

Red-links for References?

Should I remove the red-links from the References section? Or should I leave them as is? AJona1992 (talk) 00:34, 4 July 2011 (UTC)

Music video

I just cleaned up and rearranged the "music video" section in the article. It used to have some trivia in there that really wasn't important (the fact that Selena wore her husband's shirts.) I also took out the part about how filming was interrupted because Selena didn't have the license to the song. That sentence made no sense; a license is not a physical object -- it is the rights of ownership and usage. Maybe it meant to say that she didn't have the paperwork proving she had license to use the song? Either way it made no sense and was trivia so I took it out.

The section is very short and needs some more information about how the critics liked (or didn't like) the music video. Was it shown on MTV? Are there any relevant statistics? That sort of thing needs to be added, maybe a paragraph about its reception.

Cheers -- Mukkakukaku (talk) 19:40, 4 July 2011 (UTC)

Thanks for cleaning that up. May I ask if I can add (so it won't be short) about the video? Like I did to No Me Queda Mas? Thanks, AJona1992 (talk) 00:18, 5 July 2011 (UTC)

Sure, the "No Me Queda Mas" music video section is a good start. A description of the video, perhaps some mention of themes, awards, and reactions. I wouldn't put the awards in table form, especially if there is only one, and would include that in the main section though. --Mukkakukaku (talk) 00:21, 5 July 2011 (UTC)

Well "Amor Prohibido"'s music video wasn't nominated for any awards like "No Me Queda Mas". I'll try to find some reactions in the Billboard archives. AJona1992 (talk) 00:23, 5 July 2011 (UTC)

GA comments

Okay:

• Would suggest there's a link added here and back at Amor Prohibido which links to each other (e.g. on this one, For the album, see Amor Prohibido. and for the other one For the song, see Amor Prohibido (song).
• A.B Quintanilla III missing"." after B.
• Try hard to do all the red links.
• "The lyric describes a relationship between a man and a woman. While their love is tested by poverty, differences and parental disapproval." not grammatically correct for me. And I'm not sure "poverty" nor "parental disapproval" are simple terms.
• "a classic hit " what is a "classic" hit?
• Don't forget we're writing for Simple English readers so long sentences (for instance) should be minimised. e.g. "The song helped appeal to large and younger audiences because of Selena's choice of "stepping out" of the Tejano genre and becoming more contemporary Latin music. " is not simple, and uses complex words, and is probably too long.
• Avoid the use of # to mean number.
• References should be placed on the right-hand-side of punctuation e.g. ).[1] and not between e.g. )[1]. or before [1]). where possible.

That's a start. Plenty more to do, but let's try to get this little lot sorted. The Rambling Man (talk) 16:15, 5 July 2011 (UTC)

 Fixed AJona1992 (talk) 16:23, 5 July 2011 (UTC)

Also:

• "While their love is put to the test by money, differences and disapproval from their parents." in the lead is not a sentence.
• "This gave other non-Mexicans to enjoy Tejano." in the lead is not a sentence either.
• "And telling listeners to stick with their partner, no matter what may happen." in section Composition is not a sentence either.
• The second paragraph in the lead has some very long sentences.
• The part of the section about the music video that describes what happens in the video needs references

--Mukkakukaku (talk) 02:02, 9 July 2011 (UTC) --Mukkakukaku (talk) 03:04, 9 July 2011 (UTC)

References

Just some general reference questions and comments:

• Why are the "album credits" (liner notes?) credited to Barnes and Noble and Amazon?
• Citations to a video/film should have timestamps.
• I do not think about.com is a reliable source

-- Mukkakukaku (talk) 23:04, 5 July 2011 (UTC)

Also, Amazon reviews are not reliable sources. They're the equivalent of a self-published source. --Mukkakukaku (talk) 23:06, 5 July 2011 (UTC)

• Note However, the English Wikipedia allowed them as reliable sources and was subsequently passed to GA status. AJona1992 (talk) 18:29, 7 July 2011 (UTC)

OK, I'll bring it up at English wiki. Either way Barnes and Noble/Amazon should not be credited for the album credits. (What are album credits anyway? Are those supposed to be liner notes? The recording company is probably the copyright holder.) --Mukkakukaku (talk) 20:48, 7 July 2011 (UTC)

I fixed the problems you had brought up. I replace them with WP:RS from newspapers found at google.news search. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 20:32, 17 October 2011 (UTC)

Peer review

This is the Peer review that you requested.

Positives

1. Well written with the exception of some suffixes.
2. Reasonably well referenced.

Negatives

1. Suffix problem has made a tiny return.
2. More ref's needed in Music Video

Conclusion

Not your best, but it's pretty good. Not bad at all. Good work. Orashmatash 18:23, 5 October 2011 (UTC) I like... Dogs!

Need some feedback

I just completed a c/e on the Amor Prohibido (song) article. I also finished what was asked for on the GA review (back from July 2011) while also adding more WP:RS per request. Can anyone give some feedback that would help the article pass WP:GA once nominated? I also have a question, a request was made that the "music video" section should contain sources (for the descriptions) however, the descriptions are the synopsis of the video. Similar to synopsis/plot sections of movies (on simple) they are not required to have a WP:S (or so I've seen example Bridge to Terabithia (2007 movie)). So are articles based on music that has a description on its music video should require a source? And if so, would the source be the video itself since there aren't any coverage of the video's description? Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 19:59, 17 October 2011 (UTC)

I can't help you with the questions about sources, but here are a few things that I think need to be changed:

• "had helped write the song" - I'd rather see "also" than "had", but this may just be personal preference.
• "Selena's choice of "stepping out" of Tejano music was liked by music reviewers." - I'm not sure what this sentence actually means. The best interpretation I have is that Selena chose to "step out" of the Tejano genre and pursue other styles, but it seems oddly worded for that.
• "some of them being non-Hispanics." - Where this clause is positioned, it looks like it's modifying "Amor Prohibido".
• "While it was prepared by Joe Ojeda, and Chris Pérez, the widower of Selena." - Sentence fragment.
• For a section about "Background and inspiration", I'd like to see more details about the inspiration of the song. You say some things about how it was inspired by her grandparents, but don't go into detail about that, although it seems really interesting.
• "that is mix with modern Latin pop and South American rhythms." - "Mixed", not "mix".
• "The message of the song, describes a relationship between a man and a woman." - Don't need the comma here.
• The "Composition" section seems a bit short in comparison to the others, but I'm not sure if there's actually more information you can add.
• "A.B., wrote most her songs out-of-the style of "Tejano" and "Tex-Mex" (Texas-Mexico) music." - Don't need the comma. Also, "out-of-the style" seems odd; I don't really like the hyphens there.
• "Which included seven number-one hits, both of which included the song "Amor Prohibido"." - Sentence fragment.
• "Music Choice On Demand, selected several Selena music videos, including "Amor Prohibido", as a tribute to over 42 million homes nationwide." - Don't need the first comma.
• "which made them wonder about Selena's father, Abraham Quintanilla Jr, and called him an "over-influential" to Selena." - I'm not sure how this is connected to the rest of the sentence at all. How does "seamless" relate to the influence of her father?
• "The music video was filmed in Joshua Tree, California by Tango Productions." - I think - and I'm not sure (terrible at paying attention in grammar class - that there should be a comma after California.
• "The music video begins when Selena running towards an open door in the desert." - "with", not "when".
• "After Selena had spun" - Huh?
• "The video ends with Selena and her boyfriend, running away from the world, and going into a new one together." - Don't need the comma after boyfriend.

Sorry about how most is this is editing/grammar stuff - I couldn't really think of any content that needed to be added, as I'm not familiar with Selena at all. Hope that's helpful. (: [+piccolo] 01:07, 19 October 2011 (UTC)

Thanks!!! I'll go ahead and fix everything you have stated. I really appreciated. BTW, I think I'm the only one who is familiar with Selena. *Shocker* lolz. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 15:07, 19 October 2011 (UTC)

 Fixed I hope now it is ready for WP:PGA. I'll move this discussion to the talk page. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 15:38, 19 October 2011 (UTC)

PGA comments

These are some comments about the nomination for GA.

• See also → Related pages.

 Done

• In the lead, it says "The song helped Selena to attract large and younger audiences to her concerts." - Should be changed to "The song helped Selena attract larger and younger audiences to her concerts.". Also, how did it help?

 Done

• In the lead, it says "Various recording artists worldwide have since made their own versions of "Amor Prohibido", some of the singers are non-Hispanics." - One part should probably be changed to " ... versions of "Amor Prohibido", and some of the ...".

  Can you explain a bit further? I am having trouble understanding what you want me to change. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 17:57, 19 December 2011 (UTC)

  Change the comma to an "and". :-) -Orashmatash- 17:59, 19 December 2011 (UTC)

 Done

• In the "Background and inspiration section", it says "Quintanilla II had written the song ..." - Shouldn't that be changed to "Quintanilla II wrote the song"?

 Done

• In the same section as above, it says "Selena told interviewers that "Amor Prohibido" had meant ...", should probably be changed to "Selena told interviewers that "Amor Prohibido" meant ...".

 Done

• Same section again, it says "Selena had promoted "Amor Prohibido" ...", no need for the "had".

 Done

• Same section, it says " ... were the first crowd to watch Selena perform "Amor Prohibido", when she had began touring ...", no need for the comma after "Amor Prohibido", or for the "had" after "she".

 Done

• Same section, what is "airplay"? Probably should be clarified with a link to Wiktionary or an article on it.

 Done

• Same section, it says " ... became the most successful single, along with No Me Queda Mas, of 1994 and 1995 in the". In the what?

 Done

• In the "Composition" section, it says "The message of "Amor Prohibido" ..." - I don't think the "The message of" part is really necessary.

 Done

• In the "Critical reception" section, it says ""Amor Prohibido" helped Selena to attract bigger crowds in her concerts." - "to" isn't needed and "in" should be changed to "to".

 Done

• In the same section as above, some of the references need organised in numerical order.

 Done

• Same section, it says "This was because of her fourteen top-ten singles in the "Top Latin Songs" chart. Which included ..." - This should be in the same sentence, so replace the full stop (you'll probably know it as a "period") with a comma.

 Done

• Same section, it says "To celebrate and honor Selena during her fifteenth anniversary of her death ..." - "during her" should be changed to "during the".

 Done

• In the "Music video" section, it says "After Selena had spin around once ...". This should be changed to "After Selena spins around once", or "After Selena spun around once". I personally think the first one will look nicer, but they will both work.

 Done

• Same section, it says "The video ends with Selena and her boyfriend, running away from the world, and going into a new one together.". No need for any commas in that sentence.

 Done

• In the "Books and articles" section, shouldn't the ISBN numbers have hyphens? I may be mistaken, though.

  No, unless I did them in the references (consistency)

  Must've been mistaken then. :-) -Orashmatash- 18:03, 19 December 2011 (UTC)

  It's all good :-) Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 18:06, 19 December 2011 (UTC)

• The end sections are in the wrong order. It should go: "Related pages", "Notes", "References", "Books and articles", "Other websites". Check the other GA's if you don't believe me.
  

 Done That's all I could find. Other reviewers may find some things which I didn't. I made some minor wording changes myself. Good luck with it, and let me know when you're done so I can have a final look over it. Best, -Orashmatash- 17:13, 19 December 2011 (UTC)

I have  Fixed all the errors you found. Thanks again for your wonderful reviews :-) Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 17:57, 19 December 2011 (UTC)

Some new comments

The article is looking good, much improved from last time I looked.

• There is some double linking, that is the same thing is linked more than once. Check through it carefully, but I noticed her brother's name, father's name, and California.
• some repetition - one example is about who wrote the song where the same sentence appears in the intro and in the main body of the article. For the intro, the backup singer's name is enough. Keep the other info for the main part.
• Hispanic - needs to defined/linked
• "stepped out of Tejano music and had pursue other Latin genres" - poor expression
• There are some non simple words such as premiered, pursued, consecutive, inspiration, influential
• You should remove the linked date in one of the refs: ↑ "Otro rollo". Presenters: Adal Ramones. Otro rollo. Univision, Puebla, Mexico. 19 February 2009.

  I didn't link the dates, I'm not sure why it does that but TRM also commented on that on the Selena article. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 14:19, 24 December 2011 (UTC)

Hmm, must be a template issue.--Peterdownunder (talk) 12:04, 25 December 2011 (UTC)

It was, have now removed the date links in the template.--Peterdownunder (talk) 21:19, 25 December 2011 (UTC)

I'll leave more comments after Christmas, --Peterdownunder (talk) 12:08, 23 December 2011 (UTC)

Thanks for reviewing! Happy holidays, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 14:19, 24 December 2011 (UTC)

• "Selena, who also co-wrote the song, began to hymn in her tour bus"...should that read hum, as in sing a melody without words, hymn is a religous song sung in church.--Peterdownunder (talk) 12:04, 25 December 2011 (UTC)

   Fixed Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 04:12, 28 December 2011 (UTC)

• "Quintanilla III wrote most of her songs out of the style of "Tejano" and "Tex-Mex" (Texas-Mexico) music"...do you mean "in" the style, or they were from a different genre?--Peterdownunder (talk) 12:15, 25 December 2011 (UTC)

  They are both different genres, and he didn't write her songs in the style of, rather out of the styles of those genres. Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 04:12, 28 December 2011 (UTC)

• I don't understand this sentence: "The editor stated that "[Amor Prohibido and the title track], both of which enjoyed popularity in Latin America [...]".[17] What did the editor state? And why the brackets? Did you mean it to say "The editor stated that Amor Prohibido and the title track were popular in Latin America.

   Fixed Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 04:12, 28 December 2011 (UTC)

• "Amor Prohibido" was prepared by Joe Ojeda, and Chris Pérez, the widower of Selena." This should read "husband of Selena", he only becomes a widower after her death, and at this time it sounds like she was still very alive.

   Fixed Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 04:12, 28 December 2011 (UTC)

• "...to ever achieve fame of this different style of music." Poor English - you mean "in this this different style."

   Fixed Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 04:12, 28 December 2011 (UTC)

• "as a tribute to over 42 million homes nationwide." This reads like the tribute was to the homes, not to Selena. Perhaps you should change it to "as a tribute watched in over 42 million homes nationwide."--Peterdownunder (talk) 21:14, 25 December 2011 (UTC)

   Fixed Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 04:12, 28 December 2011 (UTC)

Additional Comments

• "A Selena special" (Ref 13) needs a better citation. Is this a TV or Radio program? What network was it covered on?

There is some nit picking that I can do with the sourcing, but that is best kept for a VGA review. The article text reads well and is easy to understand. Great job on the article --Guerillero 22:03, 30 December 2011 (UTC)

• I added producers, date it premiered, series name and number. I hope that helps, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 17:50, 31 December 2011 (UTC)

• I have done a lot of pruning to improve the flow of the text. I would like to see another editor do a review before a decision is made on its GA suitability.--Peterdownunder (talk) 00:24, 31 December 2011 (UTC)

  Thanks for the c/e! Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 17:50, 31 December 2011 (UTC)