Talk:Brown recluse spider

Photo

A pic would look nice i think. 169.244.143.123 (talk) 15:17, 28 September 2009 (UTC)

 Done Griffinofwales (talk) 15:20, 28 September 2009 (UTC)

Fact?

The biology is weak, the section on diet is either unclear or wrong. I doubt any spider could go five seasons without food or water, and I doubt that anyone has observed this scientifically. The usual thing is that predators get water as part of their prey, but that's still water. the references are opaque (can't see that claim). And what's all that about eating insects that don't have "shells"?! This part is obviously rubbish which survived from earlier versions. Macdonald-ross (talk) 06:06, 24 May 2012 (UTC)

Wording much improved, though still the basis of 'soft insects' is unclear. enWP refers to its small fangs, but has no direct statement. The references at the end of the paragraph don't help... well, I suppose you don't have access to the actual text of reference 8, or you would have given a page # or a brief quote. At any rate, this would not (IMO) be a make-or-break issue.

Other points. The very high rate of misdiagnosis could be pointed up (details on enWP), and there is a diagnostic test for the venom (detail on enWP article, subsection 'validity of necrosis claims'): it's just not widely available. The last two sentences are over-referenced, and (surprisingly) that is a fault. Three or four refs max are all that's needed for a statement, and there is a WP guideline on over-referencing. Just choose the best. As I say, the last sentence has to be recast to take in the existence of a diagnosis for the venom, which is quite a rare one. Regards, Macdonald-ross (talk) 06:49, 31 May 2012 (UTC)

Comments

I really like this page! You did a great job in simplifying it. But please allow me to make a few comments. :)

• I love how simple the intro is, but (as it is introducing the whole page,) I don't think it would hurt to be a little more expanded as a slightly more specific overview of what the page is going to be about.

• Link scientific.

• Does "recluse" have a wiktionary link? If not, try to make one and link it. It doesn't seem too simple.

• "...Male and female brown recluses can be identified once the spider..." <- Perhaps "identified" could be replaced with a more simple expression?

• I think the section Description should have some more references. In the last sentence (before the Habitat section), it would be nice to have a source.

• "Brown recluse spiders like dry, dark areas with a place to hide." I think this sentence could be more organized if instead it said, "Brown recluse spiders like dry, dark areas to hide (in)." :)

• Is "tend to" a simple expression?

• "Brown recluses that live in houses usually like garages, basements, and attics, where people are less likely to bother them and where there are lots of good hiding places." This sentence seems too long. It would be nicer if it was cut up.

• "Sometimes brown recluses sent through the mail do set up colonies in warehouses, but they do not venture very far from their colony, which is usually not well-established in the new place." <- This sentence seems too long as well. Is "venture" a simple word?

• Link hesitate.

• Link pounces.

• "Its fangs contain a deadly venom that kills the prey extremely quickly." <- I don't think extremely is needed, but if it is, maybe "very" would be more simple.

• It's not necessary to link every single insignificant word, but sometimes a neat amount of blue links is needed. In the section Behavior, there are no links at all. Maybe three or four would be better.

• I think "circulate" is not simple enough. Could it be changed or linked?

• "...except for certain kinds " Could this be changed to "except for some kinds"?

• "people will often take drastic approaches..." I'm pretty sure "drastic" isn't simple.

• "Very little is known about the venom of the brown recluse, and spider venom experts have been looking for a long time for ways to effectively tell whether a brown recluse has bitten a patient as well as an antidote for its venom." <- Maybe this sentence should be split up too.

Well, that's about it. I hope I was of some help! (>^_^)> I think the page is very interesting and fun to read. Please let me know when you've attended to all my comments! ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:39, 27 May 2012 (UTC)

Thanks for the very helpful pointers! I'm working on it as I find time (thanks to a very busy schedule!). I've added several links so far and had some fun writing stubs on Wikipedia and Wiktionary to prevent unnecessary red links (on topics ranging from "fang" and "epigynum" to "bug spray" and "oil pan"!). Certainly not finished yet; I'll let you know when I get to a good point again to get more input. Bob the WikipediaN ^{(talk • contribs)} 05:16, 31 May 2012 (UTC)

"Misunderstood?"

In the opening paragraph it claims that the Brown Recluse is misunderstood. How is this encyclopedic? — Preceding unsigned comment added by 138.51.19.130 (talk • contribs)