Talk:Hurricane Ismael

This article is a good article. This means the community feels it is written well.

Some thoughts

Okay...

• hurricane needs a link
• link "formed"
• Maybe cut a couple of the longer lead sentences in half to improve the readability stats.
• Infobox - dissipated isn't Simple. Neither is pressure.
• I never ever saw the point of the storm path template. It's just a really small thumbnail with "storm path" caption. I'd just use a regular thumbnail so it's the same size as other thumbnails....
• Is "weather system" Simple?
• Same for "depression"
• "...quickly weakened as it was torn apart by land..." not sure this is Simple either.
• "About 57 fishermen..." I always find these statements mildly strange - at least 57? what does the citation say?

• This is a bit tricky, as the source is in Spanish (and I'm only es-1), so the word they use could mean either "approximately", or "more than", or "under", etc. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 21:02, 11 May 2009 (UTC)

• Try not to start two consecutive sentences with "About..."
• "197.104 mm" way overprecise, no decimal places are needed here in my opinion, and I think a linked mm would be good.
• "A total 59 people" total of 59?
• "Rainfall from Ismael" caption - would be better as "A map of..."?
• Is "Moisture" simple?
• "...was retired, which means it will never be used again." - not keen on these run-on explanation sentences when we have wiktionary and wikilinking...
• If you fancy it, you could update all your accessdate fields. They all checked out for me.

The Rambling Man (talk) 19:18, 11 May 2009 (UTC)

• Done most of these, aside from one which I've explained above. Thanks for the review, –Juliancolton | ^Talk 21:02, 11 May 2009 (UTC)

GA

A few points:

• Is landfall simple?

• It's linked. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

Not the first time. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• the storm caused waves waves. Surely you only say waves once.

• My mistake, fixed. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• Is rainfall simple (maybe link to rain)?

• I think so. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

I'd link to rain, could confuse people. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• Link tropical storm.
• Is northward simple?

• Yes. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

I don't think so. Maybe towards the north or link to north. Could be confusing. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• Is sped up simple?

• Certainly. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

Confusing, as it's a phrasal verb. And the Sped bit isn't that obvious. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• Hurricane Ismael caused waves that were 30 feet (9 m) didn't you already say that?

• Where is this? –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

At the begining and later on. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, it's in the lead. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 20:03, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• About 57 fishermen died How can about 57 people die? Was anyone half-dead?

• Eh? It is estimated that 57 people died... –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

Not really the same meaning. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

It is indeed. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:58, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• Is flooding simple?

• Yeah. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

I'd link to flood. Could be confusing. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• Is power outages simple?

• I think it is. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

Don't agree, outages certainly isn't.

• Is paved roads simple?

• Reworded. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:47, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• Is wrecked simple?

• Should be. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:43, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

Not sure wreck is BE850 or 1500. Not simple enough. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:52, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

• sheets links to sheets of paper.

• Re-targeted. –Juliancolton | ^Talk 19:47, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

That's all I could see. Yotcmdr ^{=talk to the commander=} 19:40, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

VGA thoughts

• eventually - is not encyclopaedic
• offshore - should be linked
• crop lands - or at least crop should be linked
• Because damage from the storm was so bad - a the between Because and damage is probably missing?
• Two redlinks in the template at the bottom.

That's all Barras (talk) 19:05, 2 July 2009 (UTC)