Talk:Hyderabad, India
Latest comment: 13 years ago by The Rambling Man in topic Concerns
This article used to be a good article. It was promoted on 23 October 2009 and demoted on 15 May 2011. This means the community feels this article was written very well, but is not now. You may see the vote that promoted the article here. You may see the vote that demoted the article here. |
Basic review
change- Either over 4 mil people, or 3.6mil people. Or 3.6 in the city proper, and more than 400.000 in the urban area?
- Not done 3.6mil in city, 4mil in urban area. Pmlineditor ∞ 08:03, 4 October 2009 (UTC)
- A-1 as development priorities: i have no idea what that means, others probably don't either.
- Fixed Linked. Pmlineditor ∞ 06:21, 4 October 2009 (UTC)
History
change- Generally too colloquial for my liking. First sentence: The city of H is considered to be over 400 years old; Archeologists have found.... This would make for over 2.500 years of settlement in the region (paraphrasing)
- Many of the terms need linking (Iron age, for example), bjut also the various people mentioned
- Till 1947 -> Until 1947. That sentence is incomprehesible, so should probably be rephrased.
- Split the first two parts into sentences of their own. Remaining sentences (The Nizam...) still incomprehensible.--Eptalon (talk) 07:50, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
- Work on capitalisation: British, Pakistan, are just examples for words that are usually capitalised
- Most words in English have a definite (the) or indefinite (a,an) article. There are a few passages where it is lacking
- I'm working on copyediting the section which has been written poorly. I'll do it by today. Pmlineditor ∞ 07:41, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
Other things
change- Sections with 3-4 sentences look a little short, so make the sections longer, or combine several of them into longer one
- Doing... Pmlineditor ∞ 09:57, 6 October 2009 (UTC)
- The article is over-referenced; for an article this length I would not expect more than 10-15 references.
- Not done Refs are always nice. ;) Pmlineditor ∞ 08:20, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
- Then make the article longer... :)--Eptalon (talk) 09:05, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
- Not done Refs are always nice. ;) Pmlineditor ∞ 08:20, 3 October 2009 (UTC)
- Visually, it looks a little short to me, but I know its almost 15k before deductions, so proably long enough.
All of these are just random comments, nothing like a formal review.--Eptalon (talk) 19:59, 2 October 2009 (UTC)
Concerns
changeI don't think this is GA-quality. And here's why.
- Dead links per this.
Fixed.
- Far too many red links, even for "just" a GA.
- 3 disambiguation links (development, English, groundnut).
Fixed.
- MOS problems:
- Mixture of date formats in the refs.
- 2000 -> 2,000 etc.
Done.
- 4 million -> four million.
- Typo: Banglore.
- What's referencing all the info in the infobox?
Stepping through (very quickly) line-by-line:
- What's the point of referring to something that I don't understand with a red link (i.e. A-1 city).
- "to the Ramoji Film City " needs linking.
- Grammar fail: "which has of over 2000 acres (8.1km2) of land and"
- "tell us about the ideas during Iron Age" what??
- Rewritten.
- "The rise of International Airport and real estate has a major impact " again, please use English grammar here.
- "The area has many official buildings and that area is very old" poor English.
- "From the recent time, Hyderabad has been merged with Secunderabad. This has led a large, united and populous city with many villages surrounding it.[" again, needs copyedit.
- Mix of metric and imperial measurements. Use one and provide conversions to the other.
It's also, in general, light in contents. Look at the en wiki article, you'll see masses of sections which aren't even mentioned here. The Rambling Man (talk) 17:11, 24 April 2011 (UTC)