Talk:Knut (polar bear)

This article is a good article. This means the community feels it is written well.

GA Review

• Commercial leads to a disambig page

Fixed - I changed the link from commercial -> advertising. ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• "The cub made a big raise in revenue" <-- led to a big raise or was responsible for a big raise.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• "dubbed" isn't simple, change it to "called" or link it to Wiktionary.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• Link Berlin Zoo

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• Link "celebrity"

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• "Dörflein died of a heart attack on 22 September 2008. He was 44 years old.[11]" <-- I know this is the English article as well, but why do we need it in an article about the bear?

Fixed - I removed the fact that he was 44 years old, but the heart attack fact is important because later on content about the bear missing Dörflein comes out, and the reader might not understand. ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• Bild-Zeitung should be linked

Fixed - It's a red link, but I'll create the page soon. ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• "He declared that the zoo was breaking the rules of animal protection by keeping him alive." <-- link declare

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• "Others sent emails and letters asking for the cub's life to be spared." To whom?

Fixed To the zoo. :P ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

• "The publicity from this coverage raised Knut's profile from national to international." <-- Too complex

Fixed - I simplified the sentence. ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

I haven't reviewed the entire article yet, will get to it soon. Good work btw. Pmlineditor ∞ 09:49, 1 January 2011 (UTC)

I fixed all of it, hopefully in the way you wanted. :) Thank you very much for the review, and I look forward to the rest of it! ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:51, 2 January 2011 (UTC)

I looked for vocabulary that could be simplified and either used different words, linked to wiktionary (and created the entries), or linked the words. I hope the changes are OK. I've listed them below.

• captivated -- wiktionary link
• small celebrity -- little famous
• dubbed -- called, named
• satirical -- wiktionary link
• placards -- signs
• pledged to donate -- promised to give
• plush -- stuffed animal (made stub)
• spokesperson -- wiktionary link
• tub -- package

This should be a popular article, thanks for working it up to for GA. Gotanda (talk) 00:15, 8 January 2011 (UTC)

The changes you made certainly were "OK"—no, more than OK, they were quite wonderful! Thank you very much for your fixing, the article seems in much better and simplified shape now. :) ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 07:36, 8 January 2011 (UTC)

Hi, Bella. I made a few more last minute changes. Things look very close. I tried to make a couple of sentences simpler and made a couple of slight vocabulary changes. The most important change was "popularity" to "attention" in the intro. My recent edits can be seen here[1]. Thanks, Gotanda (talk) 02:13, 24 January 2011 (UTC)

A few more comments

• Although Neumünster Zoo set a price of €700,000... It would be nice for a United States Dollar conversion here.

...Hmm. I'm not sure how to converse it into United States Dollar bills—it doesn't seem to be so in the enwiki version. Could you tell me how to change it? ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

here is a good converter. Albacore (talk · changes) 12:45, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• Knut earned the Berlin Zoo nearly €5 million that year Same thing.

Same as above. ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• Shah reportedly suggested a €3.5 million film deal to the zoo Same thing.

^As above, I'm sorry, but I don't know how to fix it. ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• German stamp with a photo of the one-year-old Knut and the slogan Natur weltweit bewahren Slogan should be linked to the wiktionary, as there is an article there for it.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• Reference 35, ABC News. Would be nice to spell out American Broadcasting Company to avoid confusion with Australian Broadcasting Corporation.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• He was 44 years old remove it, per comment above

Fixed Oops, sorry, I thought I had done that in the review before and now I see I forgot. Well, I did fix it now. :) ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• Dr. Gerald Uhlich, of the Berlin zoo, stated that Knut "draw[s] attention to the environment in a nice way., ...took pictures of Knut that were used for an environmental, do not want to remove Knut from his environment Environment is linked in the lead, shouldn't be linked later on.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• ... for the German Environment Minister's campaign Campaign is linked earlier, delink it.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

• ... been on the logo for the German Environment Minister's campaign to help stop global warming Global warming is linked earlier in the article, delink it.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

Should be about it. Albacore (talk · changes) 23:43, 13 January 2011 (UTC) Thank you, dear Albacore! I Fixed most of them, but I'm not sure about the first three comments. Well, your review was very helpful, and I hope the article looks better now! :) ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 05:28, 23 January 2011 (UTC)

GA comments

• "The cub created brought in lots of money" not sure what this means.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• You continually refer to "the Berlin Zoo" - I think if it's actually referred to as Berlin Zoo, you don't need "the" in front of it all the time.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• "zoo keepers " v "zookeeper" consistent spacing.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• Protection links to a disambiguation page, I'd try to be more specific.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• "Knut came out in public." I know what this means but it can be misinterpreted. Rephrase perhaps to "Knut appeared in public"?

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• "The national mint " is not Simple.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• "sparked international interest" not Simple.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• "to be put away" what do you mean?

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• "The money was used for making the polar bear’s home at the zoo better" don't see a reason why this couldn't be neater, i.e. "The money was used to improve the bear's home".

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

• "Knut - Stories from a Polar Bear's Nursery" should be an en-dash, not a hyphen.

Fixed ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)

The Rambling Man (talk) 14:16, 24 January 2011 (UTC)

Thank you, dear TRM! I Fixed all of them, hopefully in the right way. I hope the article looks better now! :) ♥ingly, Bella ^{tête-à-tête} 08:01, 28 January 2011 (UTC)